Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Chook_]

Hi everyone, 

I recently finished reading Stop walking on eggshells by Paul T Mason and Randi Kreger and would loveeee to discuss the book with people that had read the book, used some of the strategies etc.

another awesome book I ready was I hate you don’t leave me by Jerold J. Kreisman 

looking forward to hearing from you all 🙂

[tyme]

Hey @Chook_,

I've read them both. All I can say is that I could relate to the books very much. However, in terms of strategies, I was a little disappointed that the books focussed on all the 'terrible' things that accompanied BPD, rather than shed light on the qualities of people with BPD

I finished off reading thinking, "Yes, I know I have all these issues... now what?"

I'm interested to hear your thoughts @Chook_ 

[Chook_]

@tyme I have not read “yes I know I have all these issues now what” was it any good? 

I hate you don’t leave me- I found this very interesting and educational as I initially started reading this when I was just beginning my journey learning about bpd. 
I agree that both books don’t talking about any of the positives, I do really like the UP SET conversation style, it has helped me in many situations both at home with my partner and at school dealing with heightened children.

[tyme]

Hey @Chook_ ,

That was not the name of the book. 

I meant, that after I finished reading the two books you mentioned, i was left thinking, "I have all these issues.. now what?"

Hope that makes it clearer. Sorry I wasn't clear the first time 🙂

Happy reading!

[Chook_]

Hahaha no my bad , now that I reread that message it makes sense. It’s been a big day. @tyme 

[Jasper_123]

Hi @Chook_  - I haven't read the book you're talking about because I absolutely hated the title and the blurb. I think it's really difficult to find books or media about BPD that is helpful, informative and doesn't paint us as villains. 

Have you heard of the holistic psychologist ? She is on instagram and also has books which I've enjoyed! Also looks into the vagus system has been really helpful for me understanding my bodies response to things! 

[Chook_]

@Jasper_123 thanks for your reply. 

My partner said the same thing about both of the titles, I don’t recommend Walking on eggshells for someone with BPD to read, it could absolutely be triggering. I do think it was good (for me) as a carer in being able to understand BPD more and help me to put boundaries in place/ care for myself as much as I care for my partner. 

I hate you don’t leave me- also a shitty title but my partner did find parts of that book helpful, he didn’t like seeing the cover of the book initially but has since read most of it. 

And I do follow the holistic psychologist, she has some great posts and resources. 

[EternalFlower]

I think walking on eggshells is a terrie book for carers and suffers of bpd.

I don't recommend that book for those trying g to support people with bpd 

[tyme]

I've read it @EternalFlower @Chook_ @Jasper_123 . I found it comforting and a bit of an 'ah-ha' moment for those who are carers of someone with BPD. However, from a BPD perspective, I didn't find it helpful.

I guess if depends on what you are looking to get from the book.

Hope you are all okay.

[Chook_]

@tyne agreed and I think from what perspective you read it from/ how you interpret it.
A big part for me that I find comforting is knowing I’m not alone in this, there are others caring and living with someone going through similar hurdles- a bit like this forum as well. It’s hard for just anyone to understand so it’s felt like a support crew through stories for me even if I don’t directly know or talk to the person.