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Looking after ourselves

FightingForLOVE
Senior Contributor

HELP! For the desperate.

How do I just sit here feeling alone and exhiled from his life for things I haven't done not knowing even if he still loves me? 

 

How do I live with the fact he might not and I don't even get a proper goodbye?

 

I've lost SO MUCH in my life usually for things I haven't done wrong. How can I just sit here and loose him????

 

Anyone been where I am? Anyone got anything? I'm desperate!!!!

 

 

6 REPLIES 6

Re: HELP! For the desperate.

@FightingForLOVE looking back at some of your recent posts it sounds like it's been a really challenging and confusing time. It must be terrible to manage the insecurities that you've described. Sitting with you tonight. 

Re: HELP! For the desperate.

@moxi 

 

It is indicribably hard. Thank you for your support I know there isn't anything anyone can do I just hope for some empathy or advice. As stated b4 if he still loves me then all this is courageous and loyal but if he dasn't then it takes on a negative I don't think I can handle. 

 

I already feel like a pariah for how ppl in our lives have viewed my devotion. 

 

I miss him so dreadfully as well which dasn't help with coping. Ppl keep telling me to take care of me but no one seems able to tell me how to do that. 

 

Is it really so terrible that I'm holding on till I know for sure, if everyone knew how deep and wonderful a  relationship we had b4 then they'd hold on too. After all this is my future- OUR future- we are talking about here, some bad advice from the negative ppl in our lives could destroy that future stone dead. I can't say for him, but for me, he. is. the. one. I won't fall again. I know that much about myself. 

 

Maybe I'm just loosing my mind and I'm already just the crazy lady holding on to nothing and just can't accept that he's already gone....

 

I just don't know anymore.

Re: HELP! For the desperate.

@FightingForLOVE I can hear how passionate your love is and I can understand not being willing to let that go. 

 

It's hard when everyone tells you to look after yourself, but no one tells you what that might look like. Self care is different for everyone but we've written a couple of articles on the subject, I wonder if you've come across them? I'll leave them here for you, just in case: 

 

Families, Friends and Carers

Effective Self-Care During Disaster and Recovery 

Re: HELP! For the desperate.

@moxi

Thank you. I'll look into the links.

Re: HELP! For the desperate.

Good morning @FightingForLOVE ❤️

I think the articles that @moxi included in their last post are really great. 

 

You seem like such a caring and loving person, make sure that you are pouring some of that love and care into yourself and filling up your own cup (whatever that may be!) 

 

Self care can be a bit tricky at first, trying to navigate what you actually enjoy and what would also beneficial for yourself can feel like such a foreign concept. For me, I love to take a really long walk, or a hot bubble bath, or sometimes I will take myself out on a solo date to get my favourite meal. 

Sometimes doing things like this can help us to feel loved by ourselves, and that can really translate into how we feel from/ towards other people, and help us to feel a little bit less isolated from other people because our time is being filled with loving ourselves. 


Sitting with you ❤️

 

Warm regards, 

 

Amber22

Re: HELP! For the desperate.

@amber22 that is some good advice. I might try the date by myself for my favourite meal when I feel better 

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