Lived Experience Forum

[BossBaby]

@The-red-centaur sorry forgot to tag you in last message, hope you had a good sleep.

[The-red-centaur]

@BossBaby I slept ok. I am still so tired. 

I tried suicide last night. I'm over it all. Trying to move forward focus on the positives but it's really hard. I need out. 

[LouLouMagoo]

Hey Red, I just sent you an email to check in 🙂

[BossBaby]

@The-red-centaur, I keep thinking I have no experience with suicide. But in a way my whole life there has been a preoccupation with death - dying to self, "no longer I who live" as a Christian and then beyond that Buddhist concepts of "remaining in the Unborn", dying before you die, etc. Can I ask if this pain feels like yours alone or is it more of a familial trajectory that you're trying to change course in your life? Is there anything you can "put to death" in your life without having to physically end it? Oh gosh it's Easter too. I don't know if this will help but it's probably the only way I can help.

[The-red-centaur]

Thrers only one thing that needs to be put death

[Friendlyflutter]

Hey @The-red-centaur, 

We have sent you an email and we haven't heard back from you, looking forward to your reply there. 

[BossBaby]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KptnzfuTnag

@The-red-centaur I hope you can have release from what is holding you to this sense of unresolvable, insurmountable torment.

[The-red-centaur]

@BossBaby @Friendlyflutter 

I'm really sorry if I worried you yesterday. I ended in hospital. Safely. And got through the night with a bit of support. 

I'm doing better today. When I got home I hang put at the park with my support worker then painted during the afternoon. I have a lit going on and it felt good to talk to a professional about my feelings. 

[The-red-centaur]

This is what I finished today. 

[BossBaby]

@The-red-centaur I thought it was pretty much at the point of crisis support but I wanted to offer something by way of support and conversation.