Lived Experience Forum

[roly]

in 2008 i got into trouble with some very bad people they got bikies after me and put a 60 thousand dollar contract on my head i got very paranoid so i went to hospital to try and get some kind of help it was the biggest mistake of my life i told the doctor what happened to me and he just didnt beleive me thought i had made it all up and diagnosed me with severe schizophrenia characterised by delusions about people being after me i was put on medication and went from a healthy 80kg to an obese 130kg after a while i dropped the dose down  and started exercising and got healthy again then i started smoking ice and had a suicide attempt  any way i survived and they put me on a community treatment order and my life has been completly destroyed by that order they ordered me to have twice monthly injections as well as other drugs

the drugs i was ordered to take made me feel so physically and mentally bad that i wanted to die every second of the day i couldnt work so i got the sack now have no employment prospects i have to live on welfare for the rest of my life. i have never encounterd more arogant nasty and downright psycopathic people than the psyciatrists i have seen. and the influence the pharmacuetical companies have on these doctors is a scandel and there should be a royal commision into it. any way thats my story.

[chibam]

Hi roly. Welcom to the forums! 🙂

To say it sounds like you've had a really rough go of it would be an understatement. To some extent, I can sympathize with your situation. I likewise went to therapists looking for help (as so many public service campaigns assures people in crisis is definitely there for them), but found myself only in a much worse place thanks to the treatment I recieved. Much like your own situation, what I found to be the worst part of the whole ordeal was the arrogance of the (worst) therapist in question. She could do no wrong and it seemed she was determined to railroad me down the treatment program that she'd been brainwashed by college into believing was "what the mentally ill need", instead of actually listening to my own specific need and making a genuine effort to remedy my crisis.

Long story short, treatment turned me from a hopeful man who needed a little help to get where he needed to go, into a broken, exhausted shell for whom a life worth prolonging seems all but a pipe dream that is impossible to make a reality.

I admit that my story doesn't seem as rough as your own, but nonetheless, I agree with you that the system - and the people staffing it, is in dire need of drastic repair.

I hope things get better for you. 🙂

[Zam]

Sorry to hear you have had such bad experiences with psychiatrists. Sounds completely unprofessional, especially where they gave you the diagnosis of schizophrenia just because they didn't believe what you were telling them.

the so called normal protocal for a diagnosis of schizophrenia is to have on going symptoms for over 6 months and to do a whole bunch of tests to rule out anything else that might be causing those symptoms. 

I personally had that all done to get a diagnosis, but I have heard many cases about them just giving out the diagnosis in a heartbeat.

the biggest problem is once you have that diagnosis, pretty much everything you say does not mean a thing to them. 

Normally if you haven't harmed yourself or others and have no intention of any of that, they cannot force medication on you. 

There are also places where you can go in or make a phone call to make a claim of being mistreated in the mental health area. You could always check that out. I'm not exactly sure how it works, but have heard it is good..

hope things get better for you

[Mosaic]

Hi @roly 

Welcome to the Forums 🙂 As someone who works in mental health I really cringe to hear stories like yours (and @chibam's). Unfortunately I think people who work in mental health can become jaded if they're not careful... I wonder if perhaps they disconnect from their helping role as a way to cope? Clients definitely pick up on that "rinse, repeat" attitude and it can be so counter-productive for people's recovery. In saying that, I know there are also some very genuine and compassionate people out there working in the field who really do care about people like you. I sincerely hope you do have the opportunity to encounter one or two of these 'good eggs' along the way. Finding someone you connect with can be such an encouragement. Connecting with your fellow peers (like on these Forums) can also be a wonderful thing - I am so glad you found us. Again, welcome! Look forward to hearing more of your story.  

All the best, Mosaic.   

[Appleblossom]

I belive all the previous posters have important points to make 

It is not necessarily about how tough a client's circumstances may be, listening to the unique circumstances and helping them navigate life's challenges ... should be TOP priority.

Also some therapists are jaded and some are passionately trying to help but pushing current therapeutic approaches without truly seeing client in their situation ...  projecting onto clients ... ie not doing their own emotional growth work ... and applying it in a one size fits all fashion.

I dont believe 6 months is enough to establish a true diagnosis of schizophrenia ... and one problem with the current therapeutic model ... is that it suffers from body mind duality ...which has already been discredited in mainstream thought.  They test for other medical problems to eliminate health issues but do not test or control for the SOCIAL issues that each client faces.  I am not suggesting a go back and blame the parents as that is not fair or accurate ... may only sometimes be the main cause. A wholistic approach is needed.

One of the reasons I have shared my father's story is that .... the SOURCE of his paranoia is only coming out with church sex abuse scandals .. people know what I talk about now ... when I mention his orphanage ... but in the mean time he had to endure being labelled "schizophrenic", over-drugged, denied appropriate medical treatment and thus suffered an early unnecessary death in 1971.

My siblings and I suffered his loss and also the terrifying threat of getting the "genetic" disease of schizophrenia. 

We also need to acknowledge the improvements that have been made since then ... and since the 19thcentury ... YET ... from what I read on the forum ... it is not up to par with the prevailing notions .. that help is available and if someone is struggling its because they arent trying hard enough ... cos look at all the therapists and public and private services out there.

In reaction I have felt compelled to endure risks and analyse and test my fears to the nth degree.

Its also not just about being nice and empathetic on a simple verbal level ... but actually being able to enter into the client's world ... and do some of the thinking for him to help ... reduce the pressure and the overwhelm ... medicine should be the last resort not the first thing ... and then go and see a psychologist.

Work on life issues for a couple of years and then if needed gradually introduce grugs ... the truth of tardive dyskenisia and other side effects needs to come out.

[Lost9]

Hi to all, I am new to the forums and been through the mill myself with a diagnosis of depression and later schizophrenia for around 30 years. I have experienced many psychiatrists and a few psychologists but I have found few helpful. My first experience of psychosis responded well with medical treatment but unfortunately my second episode did not respond to treatment. My depression did not respond to treatment for about 20 years but finally I found some medication which helped considerably. I have been told by at least two psychiatrists to “ fake it until I make it,” in other words not to let my symptoms show or talk about my experiences. I have tried to do this but then people treat me as though I have no disability and get disgusted with my lack of competence, attention, occasionally irritable, unsociable behaviour. I feel abused and lost. Friends who know me say that my symptoms don’t show but I under perform. The only person who can tell I have symptoms is my mother whom I live with. I have stopped trying new medication because there is not much new medication for me left to try. I am on and have just about reached the recommended limit of antipsychotics I can take. Are others having the same problems? Are there other ways of dealing with paranoia and mistrust? Are there better ways of dealing with others low opinion of me without feeling low self esteem?

[chibam]

Hi @Lost9  Welcome to the forums!

Wow! What a nostaglia trip, getting a notification about fresh activity in this old thread!

In response to your post, I've found that "fake it until you make it" didn't work for me. My therapist more or less advocated the same approach (although I don't recall her using that phrase). In the end, it only aloud people to continue to exploit me, with no likelihood of an ultimate reward for me at the end of the tunnel.

I started out "faking it" by pretending to live the life I wanted to live and initially, I found that very fulfilling and successful. But then seemingly overnight, everybody else turned cold on me for "faking it" and so it became unethical to continue to live that way, though it was a great loss to myself. Then I tried being more accommodating to what other people wanted me to be in my "fakings", but that didn't work either. The others were still cold and uncharitable to me and I couldn't stand playing a character I had no respect for. I also suspect I did a very poor job of faking the role that others wanted me to play, as I never really understood what they wanted. So maybe, if you better understand what the others around you want you to fake, you'll have better luck?

I'm sorry that I can't offer more concrete answers. I know your probably desparate for them. But TBH, I don't understand the world at all, myself.

[Lost9]

Thanks Chibam,

It is good to hear others have the same problem. It makes me feel less alone. I think others want me to pretend nothing is wrong when I think it is. I try to go along with this but some days I just can't. It is ok with acquaintances because I can talk about a hobby, the news or just about anything other than what I am going through but over time this wears thin. I withdraw and find it hard to make friends. Luckily We have some good neighbours and a few family friends who know I have problems so I'm not totally isolated but I have felt frustrated with the mental health system that can't seem to treat me and wants me to pretend I have no symptoms when I hear voices the moment I wake until I go to sleep. And sometimes interrupting my dreams. It's exhausting! But thanks once again for your reply.