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Sharon99
Casual Contributor

Dissociative disorder

Hello, I am seeking support and advice.  Its my first time on this site. 

My daughter was 17 when she first experienced a dissociative episode. It was terrifying for all involved. She is now 19, she had 1 whole year of no episodes. This year she has had two. Sadly this impacts her ability to work and function and its hard to even describe this to those she works for. The first couple of days its like I need to help her shower, brush her hair, remind her to eat. She forgets simple everyday tasks. When she is well, she is the most independent young woman and has the kindest heart and incredible educator.  Im struggling to get her support that doesn't cost an absolute fortune and someone she can gel with that will encourage her to stay connected to get the ongoing support.  We don't fully understand how this has happened  and have not yet got a definitive diagnose.  I am struggling to know how to support her. Feeling so sad, her mum. 

5 REPLIES 5

Re: Dissociative disorder

Hi

I only just found this site tonight while searching ways to support my 18yr who's mental health is declining rapidly and I felt the need to join and respond when I read what u wrote 

As a mother it is so hard to know where to turn and what the right course of action is

The system is so overloaded and expensive with long waits between sessions and very little support which makes coping let along recovery very difficult 

Unfortunately there is no easy fix and no magic solution 

There is hard work and constant set backs

I am so scared and I feel so helpless 

All we can do is be there with love, support and always let them know we are there for them no matter what

And mum stay strong ❤️

Re: Dissociative disorder

Hello again mamanorlax, 

 

Thank you so much for replying.

 

Im really sorry to hear your 18yo is also struggling and the devastating impact it has on you too. 

 

You are absolutely right in regards to providing  love and support, that part we can do as parents. 

 

I just wished services were more appropriate for young adults to engage. My daughter has had the mental health team involved that attend the home as a one off and then she is sent to speak to the psychiatrist or advanced trainee.  On both occasions sadly they have not been of English background which was difficult for her to engage as they were both men and of Indian background and she could not understanding them and it made her feel very frightened, so this has exacerbated the situation on both occassions.  I know its not their fault, they are just doing their job and are there because they care, but we need to have services that consider the young adults needs, eg: perhaps a female. 

 

The other factor is that she can't speak and get her thoughts out during these episodes, which makes it difficult to engage. 

 

She seen a private psychiatrist, male. Which was great in terms of giving her a likely diagnosis and explained what was happening, however being a male she was not wanting to engage on her own and it became very expensive $150 per visit and could only be done in the mornings which meant asking for more time off work. She has approx 2 weeks off work each episode because she cannot function normally..this at some stage worries me that her work place might become less tolerant the more time she takes off. 

 

She has these aspirations to travel with her friend overseas, but I'm afraid this cannot happen due to the unpredictable nature of this illness. 

 

There seems to be little support, and we don't know where to turn too to get the ongoing support she needs. 

 

Is your young adult child under a psychiatrist? Can I help in anyway? 

Stay strong, and reach out if you need to talk. 🌺

 

Re: Dissociative disorder

Hi @Sharon99,

Welcome to the Forums. My name is FloatingFeather and I am one of the peer support workers at SANE. Thank you for sharing part of your story with us. It sounds like you and your daughter have been going through some pretty challenging experiences over the last couple of years. Unfortunately I don't have experience around dissociative identity disorder (DID) or any wise words of wisdom but I can offer you some links below that may be of some help. 

Here is a link to some information about DID information I have also attached a link to posts around dissociative identity disorder that may be of interest to you DID. This is a link to an organisation called Reach Out which is an Australian organisation that is specifically for younger people with mental health issues (as well as having a section for their parents to get support) Reach Out

I also want to encourage you to get some support for yourself as this would be really difficult for you as well. As a person that is a carer to someone with a serious mental health issue I am aware of the rollercoaster ride it can be to help and support a loved one whilst feeling a sense of helpless around knowing what to do or how to make things better. Do you have a GP and/or a good friend/family member you can talk to about what you are going through? I know it can be easy to put yourself on the back burner when supporting someone going through challenging times but I can't express to you how important it is that the carer gets cared for too. Here is a link to some information around being a carer Families and Carers. I have also attached a link to Carers Australia that you may find useful Carers Australia

I wish you and your daughter the best. I know it's not easy for anyone going through this but there is support available for you.

Warm wishes,

FloatingFeather 

Re: Dissociative disorder

Hi @Mamasnorlax,

Welcome to the Forums - it's nice to have you with us. It is also really nice that you have jumped on to support another member that is seeking support around their young adult child like you are. What I particularly like about our Forums is the ability to share and support others that may be going through something similar. I think there is a real power in sharing our lived experiences that can't really be found in any other type of therapy.

I am really sorry to read what your child and you are going through. I am a carer to a close family member that was diagnosed with a serious mental health issues many years ago so I have some understanding what it is like to watch someone you love struggle. It can be a powerless feeling wanting to help so much but not really knowing how best to do that. 

Like with @Sharon99 I would really encourage you to reach out for support for yourself in addition to your child. Being a carer it is easy to forget you also need help - the idea of putting the oxygen mask on yourself first is something that I often think about when being a carer. I will add a couple of links here that may be of help:

Families and Carers 

Carers Australia  

This is a link to an Australian organisation called Reach Out. This organisation is specifically for younger people with mental health issues and also has a section for their parents to get support Reach Out.

I wish you and your child all the best - you sound like an amazing mum that is doing everything in your power to help your 18yr old. That's all any of us can really do.

Warm wishes,

FloatingFeather

Re: Dissociative disorder

Thank you so much floatingfeather for your suggestions, links and support. I really do appreciate the kindness you and others have offered. Thank you again.
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