Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Fudge2]

Morning 

My husband was diagnosed 16 years ago.

Its been a long hard road. With some beautiful bits and some really dark bits

Its been very lonely at times. Most people don't understand his illness and are scared of it. Not even giving him a chance to get to know him

[Gunnygal]

Hi Fudge2, I am new to this forum but thank you for this post, it's nice to hear there are others in nearly the exact position as I am. My husband has recently been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder on top of years of BPD. I have two young boys as well and don't know how longer I can keep "holding" up the family. I agree it is exhausting and am at my witts end what to do.
Stay strong, I totally understand the pain you are going through.

[Ma_12]

I feel for you 😢 I too was married when I was young (19yrs) and have 3 children. But my circumstances differ in that whilst I was supporting my husband to get treatment for his depression, he was seeking counsel from another woman who he eventually left me and the kids for. For 15months after walking out on us he had being saying that he was getting psychological help but I recently found out that he had actually moved countries to live with that woman. I can't help but think I enabled his deceit and lies but believing his depression stories. I think I have too much sympathy cos I still want to believe him even now but can't tell if he's lying because he's depressed or if he really doesn't love me and my kids anymore. I work full time and raise my kids on my own. It's the worst experience of my life and I don't know what to do or if I should just move on 😢

[wantstofix]

Ma_12,

      I'm hearing you, Easier said than done but it sounds like it is his loss... sounds like you are far better off without that in your life. I feel your pain but I am sure that things will get better for you. 

I highly recommend counseling as it is the one thing that has helped me a lot. Still a long way to go but am at least moving. I hope you're moving forward as it is the only way to go .